You know what the Darwin Awards are: posthumously granted to people who are gracious enough to remove themselves from the gene pool before they reproduce and pass on their stupid gene. We know they deserve a Darwin Award, because winners’ premature exits from the planet are always orchestrated by their own insanely dumber-than-a-box-of-rocks actions.

Sadly, Rielle Hunter has removed herself from possible contention by giving birth.

She would have been a lock, too, because she’s obviously dumber than the aforementioned box of rocks. I know this because I may not be a rocket scientist, but I know this: no professional photographer on the planet asks you to pose in your panties for a headshot. And I really know better than to pose for pictures in my underwear, on a bed, for GQ (this is sounding like Col. Mustard, in the kitchen, with a knife) and then tell the world that I cried for two hours when I saw the pictures because they were such a surprise! I had no idea! WTF??? (Oddly reminiscent of the Sharon Stone/Basic Instinct defense…is this a blonde thing?)

Tip: If GQ had done an interview with Mother Teresa, they would have looked for a sexy angle. Might not have found one, but they would have looked. When your claim to fame (and the reason for the interview) is that you bedded a politician, something tells me that they’re gonna play the sexy angle up a little bit. Ya think?

It all fits, though, because “Johnny (I fell into grace)” Edwards actually thought he could pull off his own lies about his affair with Hunter and the paternity of his daughter, even though everyone and their dog knew of the situation.  Tip: When the National Enquirer is cracking your little mystery, you haven’t put together an airtight case.  These two brainiacs deserve each other.

That study that concluded liberals were smarter than conservatives? They must not have included these two in their sample.