In July, 2006, Babytalk Magazine did something really crazy and out-there: they put a picture of a baby on their magazine. It wasn’t just any ol’ baby, though; the baby was eating its breakfast, and all kinds of hilarity ensued (http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/14065706/):
We learned something new today: if you’re publishing a magazine about babies, you’d best not put a picture of a baby eating on the cover.
If the baby is breastfeeding from an actual (gasp!) breast, then you’re gonna get letters, because that is apparently more controversial than say, a photo of the baby nursing a neat whiskey and kicking back with a fine cigar.
Recently a free magazine for young parents called Babytalk decided that a compelling topic would be “Why Women Don’t Nurse Longer.” A thoughtful look at all the different historical, cultural, and socio-economic factors affecting breastfeeding was the result.
Well, that and about 1,000 righteously ticked-off readers.
To illustrate the topic, the cover photo features a baby attached to a breast. Or to be more precise, a carefully posed, flesh-colored something that must be a breast because it would be just be dangerous for a baby to have anything else in its mouth. Either that or it’s a baby kissing the back of Mini-Me’s head and of course that’s just wrong.
But to Gayle Ash, of Belton, Texas, it was a sight that she had to keep from her thirteen-year-old son at all costs, so she shredded the magazine.
One wonders if the Ash children were breastfed; if so, then Gayle’s son has already seen this view, up close and personal and Mrs. Ash is shutting the barn door after the ahem, cow has run off.
Other women were ‘horrified,’ disgusted,’ embarrassed,’ and ‘grossed out.’ One ripped the cover off and just hoped that her husband hadn’t laid eyes on it, ‘it’ being what one amused observer called ‘Satan’s balloon of lust.’
If nothing else, the staff at Babytalk have answered their own question. Women don’t nurse longer because if they do and if they show even the slightest bit of skin, or if anyone in the vicinity is the slightest bit uncomfortable, then they and their babies are banished to the bathroom, where even I won’t eat my lunch.
We have become a nation of people who think that an item called a Hooter Hider, which is the American equivalent of the burqa for breastfeeding (“Look stylish and trendy while feeding baby!” “Nursing while entertaining family and friends is no longer stressful!”) is a great idea.
Now, I’m hardly a breastfeeding nazi. Please recall that I’m the mom who quit nursing one baby at three months because she looked too much like Ernest Borgnine.
So if I were to illustrate breast feeding, I’d feature a picture that shows breastfeeding the way I remember it: stuck in a corner at a family gathering with a blanket thrown over my shoulder and trying to calm a baby who was screaming in hunger just minutes ago but who is now just biting me. And every other relative is either pointedly ignoring me or furious that I had the gall to show THAT (Satan’s balloon, again) in public.
Let’s face it. Breasts have a dual role in our society: sex object and milk carton. Neither role fully defines them. One role often follows the other, but they don’t mix, and never in front of the children.
And certainly not within squirting distance of Gayle Ash.
We moms just want our dignity. We’re looking for it under our Hooter Hiders.
Mom, Interrupted 